Thursday, March 19, 2009

Maternity clothing rant

Ok, maternity clothing designers, we need to talk. We need to have a serious discussion as to why in the heckloslovakia I cannot find, for love, money or breastmilk, a knee-length maternity dress. That's all. I'm not asking for the moon here, I don't think. I need a dress that hits me at or just below the knees. WHY IS THIS BEYOND THE REALM OF POSSIBLITY?
Now, I must admit that this season the lovely 'town dress' has, um, come to town...which is great. Amber, it is your season. Those town dresses are YOU, girl. I even bought one. But I'm not so much into the hippie-dress-to-the-floor thing all the time...kinda awkward. And seems really dressy to me, for some reason. I just want a knee length one. I've looked in Motherhood, online...nothing. A lot of mid thigh or above the knee ones. And people, I'm here to tell you, when I am 9 months pregnant and retaining water like yesterday's milk-marinated cheerios, and also about 300 lbs overweight to boot, you DO NOT want to see me in something that hits me at the thighs. Sorry. We all have our cross to bear. Mine is terrifically ugly upper legs. Also, in the spirit of inclusiveness, I will go even further and say that it would interest me to know who is wearing these mini dresses. Are there that many people in the United States of Fatness who can wear these things through their 3rd trimesters? Because I gotta tell you, it aint just me. I see PRECIOUS FEW people who look like they need to be showing their legs at right about that time.
However, sometimes we all need to wear a dress. So why, for the love of the man Jesus, can I not find one that would flatter me? I thought this was the land of opportunity, people. Jeez. Get with the program, designers.
Or maybe I should just stick to pants.

3 comments:

Aimee said...

Ha, that's so true. Come to Japan & try to find maternity clothes & you will need to rant further, you would think no young people ever got pregnant here, EVER!. I think those mini dresses work well with maternity spats or capri pants. Otherwise, yes, they do make 'em kind of too long or too short.

Sarah Mawhinney said...

Buy the long dress and have it hemmed; it's the only way. The local dry cleaner should have no problem doing this.

Dossy and Bossy said...

Yes Amiee, I cannot bear to think what my pregnancy clothing lot would be if I was still in Japan. At least you've always been so miniscule that you can FIT the clothes, even if they are ugly as sin. I can't even remember SEEING a pregnant Japanese woman...I wonder if they hide away like the Victorians? But I feel your pain.

Sarah, that was a very good idea. I never even thought of it. And what's even better is that I can actually sew, so I could do it myself.

About Me

I was born and raised in Japan and moved to the US about 15 years ago. I met my husband in California and we moved to Texas 9 years ago. We have lived in El Paso and Hewitt (near Waco). We are blessed with three beautiful children, Noah, Dillon and Zoe. I am currently an undergraduate at Baylor University majoring in Social Work.